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"A dementing illness does not suddenly end a person's capacity to experience love or joy, nor does it end her ability to laugh," write Nancy Mace and Peter Rabins, MD in "The 36-Hour Day." Memory care facilities have activity programs to keep residents connected with life. A well-planned program focuses on enjoyment, involvement, past work/skills, favorite things, and stages of disease, according to the Alzheimer's Association.

Activities include homey things like folding laundry and special things like holiday dinners. You may plan family activities for your loved one as well. As memory disease progresses, however, it is harder for your loved one to participate in activities. Is it time to cut back? Consider these points before you make a decision.

1. Does your loved one participate fully? If participation is minimal figure out which activities he or she is ignoring. Lack of participation tells you a lot about your loved one's interests, motivation, and health.

2. How is your loved one's health? He or she may have arthritis, asthma, or require oxygen. A slight hearing loss can turn into a significant one. Vision problems add to the confusion of memory disease. Talk with the physician, head nurse, and social worker to get a clear picture of your loved one's health.

3. Is fatigue a problem? Your loved one may be so short of breath that he or she stops often to rest. Even with a walker your loved one may be unsteady. Getting in and our of a car is difficult and tiring. Your loved one may fall asleep easily. If these examples sound familiar it is time to cut back on activities that require physical effort.

4. Does your loved still enjoy the activity? Dad loved to come for Sunday dinner and now he is reluctant about it. He eats like a bird, glances around nervously, and keeps looking at his watch. The minute dinner is over Dad says, "I want to go." Clearly, Dad is not enjoying dinner. Instead of dinner at your place you may go to his.

5. Are memory joggers working? Memory joggers -- reminder notes and calls, signs on cabinets, step-by-step instructions -- can act as "a memory substitute," according to www.alzheimersdisease.com. But the memory joggers that worked before are not working now, an indication that your loved one's disease is worse. This is the time to cut back on activities.

Cutting back on activities does not mean you eliminate all of them. The Alzheimer's Association says activities can "enhance a person's sense of dignity and self-esteem." Keep the activities your loved one enjoys most and continue them as long as possible. Your reward will be a smile.

Copyright 2007 by Harriet Hodgson

http://www.harriethodgson.com

Harriet Hodgson has been a freelance nonfiction writer for 28 years. She is a member of the Association of Health Care Journalists, an elder-care advocate, and author of two books about Alzheimer's Disease. Hodgson's 24th book, "Smiling Through Your Tears: Anticipating Grief," written with Lois Krahn, MD, is available from http://www.amazon.com. A five-star review of the book is posted on Amazon. You will find another review on the American Hospice Foundation Web site under the "School Corner" heading.